Honor Thy Mother and Father.... Then What?

Floating through Mother’s Day with 3 out of 4 (kids that is) being dutiful as far as Ma Bell would make available and Father’s Day where the funnier the card is the more appreciated, I started to ponder on the Honor your Mother and Father commandment. That would be, Moses’s Number 4 in the Judeo/Christian world and Number 5 for the R.C’s, for all you heathens out there. But I digress. Now to take this literally, I would have all the boys plus daughter fawning at my feet and washing them with their contrite salty tears but that is another Cecil B DeMille moment I try not to let my psychologist know about. But, to really look at that commandment is to dig deeper.

The word Honor according to Princeton’s Wordnet is as follows:

A tangible symbol signifying approval or distinction; "an award for honor and bravery" . That works for me. All Mother’s at some point or another should be awarded for bravery especially for those late night “Come pick me up from jail calls”. A woman's virtue or chastity. May not work considering the whole honor the parent thing means this is pretty much null and void. The quality of being honorable and having a good name. Hmmm since I change my name a little bit more than most, this might have a hard time catching up with me. Respect: show respect towards; "honor your parents!" Ah BINGO! That is what it is; respect.

Respect thy Mother and Father. Pretty straightforward right? Well there are mitigating circumstances that respecting your Mother and Father may be a little hard to do such as in the case of Mom or Pop is a serial killer, crack addict that abandoned you at two, or you were beat every day of your life. But, to offer simple, decent, respect is fairly easy to a parent that loves you and would like to be a part of your grown-up life. That meaning that you have actually grown-up.

I wasn’t the easiest person to get along with in my terrible teens then my tumultuous twenties, where it could have been textbook to blame my parents for the fact that I couldn’t make a solid decision to save my life. But I don’t blame them; I maintained my rights to screw up. So if you had a difficult life then sort it out and forgive. Easy, right? No, but the benefits outweigh the pain of forgiving.

Simple, decent respect means to call your parents on a regular basis, to stop dwelling on the negative, increase the positives in your life by having a relationship with your parents that at the very least is cordial. And a real important point is if you ask for advice; don’t be pissed off when they give it. Advice from a parent is usually well tried and there is experienced knowledge behind it. And you are never too old to be pulled back out of your whirling dervish self. That is just the parental love shining through.

So to tie this up there is a great verse from Ephesians 6:1-3 that states 1 Honor (esteem and value as precious) your father and your mother 2 this is the first commandment with a promise. 3 That all may be well with you and that you may live long on the earth.

Hey check that out! You can have a long wonderful life if you respect your parents! The alternative of course is your choosing.


R. Kelly: The True Definition of Ewww...

He married Aaliyah Haughton when she was 15 years old.

He settled two lawsuits by two women who said he had sex with them when they were minors.

A third lawsuit by another woman accusing R. Kelly of forcing her to have an abortion after impregnating her when she was a teen-ager is still pending.

Can we all say P-R-E-D-A-T-O-R? Can we spell R K-E-L-L-Y?

I hope that intelligent people will realize that an “acquittal” does not mean innocent. It means there was reasonable doubt. And really good bottom feeders on your side.

According to the Chicago Tribune who interviewed the jurors after the R. Kelly Child Porn case, “At first it was 5 in favor of acquittal, 5 undecided and 2 guilty. It got as close as 7-5 in favor of acquittal before the majority was able to convince those leaning toward convicting the singer there was not enough evidence.”

After hearing from reporters the details of Kelly’s other lawsuits and obvious interest in the bobby sox set, one juror replied “All of us felt the grayness of the case," a juror explained. That grayness is another word for "reasonable doubt."

Oh give it a break! The case of the matter is that yet again another celebrity gets away with murder! Oops wrong celebrity. It is a common occurrence that Jurors across the country are sitting star struck while the most vile of criminals get acquittals.

But the jurors are not the only ones at fault here. Outside the courtroom gaggles of middle aged mommas were clamoring to touch the hand of the man that they could sell their daughter to. Yuck! Ignorance and Star Gazing go hand in hand.

I only hope that his penance will come in the form of plummeting record sales. I know many that can’t listen to a Michael Jackson song without getting the willies knowing that he and his little star gazing followers are yucking it up and thumbing their finger at the law. Kelly’s lawyers said that the true Robert was in the courtroom, thanking Jesus and spewing blubbery protestations.

Hey Kelly! Jesus had nothing to do with it pal. You will fall one day and the same Star Gazers that adore you now, with their innocent sacrificial daughters hands in tow, will be the only offal that will support you.


I'll Tell Them

And you can tell everybody this is your song

I went to see the Sex and the City movie the other night with my dearest friend and after the movie we strolled a bit in the electrically charged night air of Chicago. This was our city F and me; it was our version of New York. And just like Miranda, Carrie, Samantha and Charlotte, we had many great nights as well as many lonely nights there as well.

At dinner that night, F and I were talking about life, loves and of course children and she said something to me that struck me as the true meaning of friendship. She asked if anything happened to her, who would tell her children who she really was. Not the typical “she was a wonderful person” but the real true meaning of who she was. The effusive giggler, the voracious reader, the rambunctious whirling dervish, the brave daredevil, the creative and poetic night owl; the sides that most people don’t have a chance to see.

I said I would tell. I would tell her son and soon to be second baby F all about the strength that flowed from her that had the power of a raging river. That she had the ability to look pain in the eye and tell it “not now” and soldier on. I would tell them how her childhood may have formed her but never, ever defined her. How she could dance the night away but also spend nights just enjoying the quietness of her surroundings That their Mother practiced the art of forgiveness and never gave up hope. That she knew the true meaning of friendship.

So many of us hide certain aspects of our personality and those secrets are only spilled out in the presence of that one true friend. The friend that you can tell your story to and she will keep it locked away. A friend that never turns their back on you. A friend that knows when to pull you out of your own spinning life circus and also knows when to leave you in it; knowing that she will be there to dry the tears. And a friend that will fight for you to the bitter end because that is what she is; a true friend.

To be a true friend, you must be able to hold her secrets safely for her until the time that you need to let those that loved her know the real woman. I have a wealth of knowledge tucked away about F. My memory runs long and it runs very deep. I have stories that will show her children the real woman their Mother was. The one that I love so very much and will always be there for. I have her memorized in my mind. Even down to the shape of her hands and the serenity of her hugs. So your answer F? I will keep my promise, I’ll tell them

I hope you don't mind that I put down in words
How wonderful life is while you're in the world

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